Thursday, December 13, 2012

Judgment

One unkind tirade or one willful snap judgment can ruin our relation with another person for a whole day, or maybe a whole year. Nothing pays off like restraint of tongue and pen.
- Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 91
By what measure I judge others, I judge myself. By what measure I forgive others, I forgive myself.
P U T = Patience, Understanding, Tolerance.
 

Hi AA family, I'm Venki, and I'm an recovering alcoholic. and i'm asking a question to me. 
Q :- Do I judge.....?  
A :- Yes, I do. And I don't think it’s always a bad thing. To judge can mean to form an opinion, to be able to make critical distinctions and achieve a balanced viewpoint; discernment. I judge if someone has, what I want in sobriety. I judge if I have time to cross the street before that car coming knocks me down. And I even talk it over with trusted AA friends for me that's ok. When it becomes not ok, is when I use my own judgment, or "discernment" (the nicer word for it) to treat someone as less than; or to snub someone, or in a way that will harm them. 
Yes, the things I tend to judge tend to be things I dislike within myself. So it can be helpful, especially when I talk it over with my councilor and trusted AA friends. They point out to me that I'm struggling with the same thing. Then I know what action to take -- to ask God for help in removing this thing that causes me distress, and to help me treat others with compassion. 
Q :- Am I good at it....? 
A :- Sometimes yes, and sometimes no. These are just my thoughts on it, and on growing in sobriety.

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