It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal.
- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 66
We are prisoners of our own resentments.
A A = Altered Attitudes.
No man
will succeed unless he is ready to face and overcome difficulties and is
prepared to assume responsibilities.
By William J.H. Boetcher
One unkind tirade or one willful snap judgment can ruin our relation with another person for a whole day, or maybe a whole year. Nothing pays off like restraint of tongue and pen.
- Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 91
By what measure I judge others, I judge myself. By what measure I forgive others, I forgive myself.
P U T = Patience, Understanding, Tolerance.
Hi AA family, I'm Venki, and I'm an recovering alcoholic. and i'm asking a question to me.
Q :- Do I judge.....?
A :- Yes, I do. And I don't think it’s always a bad thing. To judge can mean to form an opinion, to be able to make critical distinctions and achieve a balanced viewpoint; discernment. I judge if someone has, what I want in sobriety. I judge if I have time to cross the street before that car coming knocks me down. And I even talk it over with trusted AA friends for me that's ok. When it becomes not ok, is when I use my own judgment, or "discernment" (the nicer word for it) to treat someone as less than; or to snub someone, or in a way that will harm them.
Yes, the things I tend to judge tend to be things I dislike within myself. So it can be helpful, especially when I talk it over with my councilor and trusted AA friends. They point out to me that I'm struggling with the same thing. Then I know what action to take -- to ask God for help in removing this thing that causes me distress, and to help me treat others with compassion.
Q :- Am I good at it....?
A :- Sometimes yes, and sometimes no. These are just my thoughts on it, and on growing in sobriety.
