Higher Power

When we look back, we realize that the things which came to us
when we put ourselves in God's hands
were better than anything we could have planned.
- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 100.

Take a walk with God; He will meet you at the Steps.
G O D = Good Orderly Direction.

 

Hi everyone, I'm Venki, a grateful Recovering Alcoholic. When I came to AA, I was drinking 3 to 4 quarter's a day. 2 to 3 day's  A week if I do'nt come to AA Don't know whare  I'll be to day,

 I was dying, and coughing,when i came to rehab. If they don't mentioned God to me I would freak out, but in the 12 Steps I learned what I needed to have a higher power, and that would be the God of my understanding. I believe.

If they told me to believe in green frogs from Mars I would have..! -__ but God...?

What I came to see as my journey started 6 months ago. I would have little moments where I would think "I wonder what that means.?"  A few minutes later, or sometimes a day later, I would get an answer.

Yesterday I was sitting here and realized I still fear complete surrender to my Higher Power -- that ‘giving it my all’ kind of thing. And I saw how many delusional, judgmental, negative things I hang onto. 

I thought I need to work on becoming more comfortable. I began to remember the times my Higher Power has pulled me through some really trying times, and then I'd forget all about it. I found myself compelled to listen when I heard someone say.

"When we make someone smaller than ourselves, or lessen them, we can immediately justify anything we want." 

It still takes my breath away, because that was me. All this time I have unintentionally made people smaller in my mind. Then I started to see the full scope of how negative towards people I can be; and I know better. That triggered me to really stop and take a breath. It was a humbling, ego-deflating moment. Through sheer accident, I’d put me on a pedestal and didn't realize I was doing it.

I was flabbergasted, and found myself yet again falling into deep gratitude. My Higher Power rocks.! He knows just how to put something in front of me to gently teach me. 

He gives it to me in a way I can understand, digest it, and grow from it.

Loneliness

As we became subjects of King Alcohol, shivering denizens of his mad realm,
the chilling vapor that is loneliness settled down. It thickened, ever becoming blacker. Some of us sought out sordid places, hoping to find understanding, companionship and approval. Momentarily we did  -- then would come oblivion and the awful awakening to face the hideous Four Horsemen -- Terror, Bewilderment, Frustration, Despair. Unhappy drinkers who read this page will understand.!
- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 151.

Happiness and peace of mind are always here, open and free to anyone.
Y A N A = You Are Not Alone.

Resentment

It is plain that a life which includes deep resentment leads only to futility and unhappiness. To the precise extent that we permit these, do we squander the hours that might have been worth while. But with the alcoholic, whose hope is the maintenance and growth of a spiritual experience, this business of resentment is infinitely grave. We found that it is fatal.
- Alcoholics Anonymous, p. 66

 

We are prisoners of our own resentments.
A A = Altered Attitudes.

No man will succeed unless he is ready to face and overcome difficulties and is prepared to assume responsibilities.
By William J.H. Boetcher

Judgment

One unkind tirade or one willful snap judgment can ruin our relation with another person for a whole day, or maybe a whole year. Nothing pays off like restraint of tongue and pen.
- Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, p. 91
By what measure I judge others, I judge myself. By what measure I forgive others, I forgive myself.
P U T = Patience, Understanding, Tolerance.

 

Hi AA family, I'm Venki, and I'm an recovering alcoholic. and i'm asking a question to me. 
Q :- Do I judge.....?  
A :- Yes, I do. And I don't think it’s always a bad thing. To judge can mean to form an opinion, to be able to make critical distinctions and achieve a balanced viewpoint; discernment. I judge if someone has, what I want in sobriety. I judge if I have time to cross the street before that car coming knocks me down. And I even talk it over with trusted AA friends for me that's ok. When it becomes not ok, is when I use my own judgment, or "discernment" (the nicer word for it) to treat someone as less than; or to snub someone, or in a way that will harm them. 
Yes, the things I tend to judge tend to be things I dislike within myself. So it can be helpful, especially when I talk it over with my councilor and trusted AA friends. They point out to me that I'm struggling with the same thing. Then I know what action to take -- to ask God for help in removing this thing that causes me distress, and to help me treat others with compassion. 
Q :- Am I good at it....? 
A :- Sometimes yes, and sometimes no. These are just my thoughts on it, and on growing in sobriety.

Spirituality

AA is a spiritual program and a spiritual way of life. Even the first half of the First Step, "We admitted we were powerless over alcohol,” is a spiritual experience. . .Yes, I began with blind faith, but the proof of truth is that it works . . . The truth was there for me to see.
- Came To Believe, p. 3.
There is no materialism in AA -- just spirituality.

F A I T H = Facing An Inner Truth Heals.